Best Fishes for a Bright Future

There comes a time in a man's life when he must decide whether to be a big fish in a small pond, a small fish in a big pond, or a fish special on a menu of diverse offerings that may include Seared Peppered Scallops with Orange-Soy Glaze, Moroccan Chicken with Eggplant and Almonds, and Blackened Red Snapper with Creole Sauce. (SPOILER ALERT: After much soul searching, I'm going with "big fish, small pond.")

Woke Up This Morning, LOL

I'm a guy who will LOL when he finds something LOL funny, which apparently isn't as often as a lot of LOL people who will LOL without any provocation whatsoever.

Example # 1: "Just bought 2 cans of diced tomatoes, lol."

Example # 2: "Thought today was the 24th, not the 23rd, lol."

Example # 3: One of these days I'll get to Wyoming, lol."

Please stop, gratuitous LOL people. LMAO (but not really).

Advice From the Weather Wizards

It annoys me when TV weather people overstep their bounds and give advice like "good day to hit that street fair downtown."

Gee, thanks for the idea weather wizard, but since you predicted "no rain" I think I'll load up on DVDs and wait for the torrential downpour.